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Where Do I Start?

It's been so long since I posted anything...I don't even know where to start. Life is crazy, hectic, upside down for me right now. I'm hoping to start blogging again for ME. To help me get things out of my brain and down onto the screen? ( I wanted to say on to paper...but that doesn't work here...) Maybe getting things out will help me to process. I don't feel like I'm ready...but this tiny post is a step in the right direction.
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Cara Box!

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I decided to sign up to participate in Kaitlyn from Wifessionals "Cara Box Exchange". I had a great time getting to know Kristyn from Chits and Giggles Blog and Kelsey from Keeping Up With Kelsey. I unfortunately had a loss in my family and fell behind on getting Kelsey's box out...thankfully she has been super sweet and her box will go out today. I definitely felt Kristyn's pain in finding things that start with K. But I hope Kelsey likes what she got! Now, on to what I received: Everything was wrapped in this cute pink tissue paper so I tried to put it in the pic :) Kristyn sent me K itKat, a Stephen K ing book (which I don't have and I'm really looking forward to reading), a Klik candy toy for my son, some nail polish (it's on the way), and a sweet note! I have to say, my son saw the toy and got so excited. He started talking so fast, I had a hard time understanding him...so I think saying he liked it is an understatement... Thanks again Kri...
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I think I'm ready for a change...pretty much a word vomit.

I don't know what my issue has been lately. I feel like maybe I could just write everything and everyone off and just run away. It's just something I can't shake. I get so, so tired of pasting a smile on my face and pretending everything is okay. It's not. One thing I know for sure is that the wrong thing to do is run away. I'm tired of being the only responsible person in my family. I feel like I'm constantly parenting my parents and my siblings. I'm tired of being the only one who tries in these relationships. I'm frustrated because I feel like every one has this expectation of me, that I'm supposed to be the one who cleans every thing up. I'm tired of picking up everyone else's pieces. I'm tired of putting everyone before myself. My relationship with my mom, my brother and my sister has failed. That's damn hard to accept. It's even harder not to run to their rescue as they're failing. I have two options in this situation....
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